Long story short: the front tire on Black Bike spontaneously mended. Now the rear tire has a slow leak for some reason. I didn't even ride it anywheres. I suspect maybe the valves are disjointed or something.
The Tersano cartridges I got on eBay didn't work. They were apparently all expired. The little indicator was green, indicating they were expired. Apparently they can expire without you even using them. Fortunately, the merchant refunded my money instantly; I suspect she found them on clearance and didn't know what she was getting into.
I ordered some replacements from Amazon, hoping they of all people will sell enough to keep fresh stock. I'm also picking up a six-pack of the AeroGarden 3 salad greens, thinking I should be able to grow that stuff now that it's cooler and I have some neem oil.